Potty Wars

Aight. Its so no secret that my Vaani is not potty trained. My free spirited way of living, parenting, and teaching has kept me from worrying about it all this time. I kinda viewed it this way-- The same way a woman goes into labor when her body and baby are aligned and ready, no matter how many times the Doc comes in to say, "Miss, its time.." the process will take place when its TIME. The same way, no matter how many times I say, "Baby, its time.." she will go potty when her mind and body is ready. Im now starting to doubt my theory on that one. She will be 3 in December!! Here's a little rant on my frustrations with that. Dont judge me, I can do what I want.

So Im a new mommy. A young mommy. 20 something, and I dont know anything. This is all trial and error and I spend more time researching than implementing. (I DO implement tho. Dont get me wrong now..) Im truly a work in progress.

I take all -- well MOST -- of the advice I get from my elders, and from my 3 to 5 children havin veterans. But here I was thinking I knew something, only to find out that Im in the middle of the ocean with no engine. (Oops, did I need that thingy too?).. Rrrrrrriiiggght.

Now here's my experience. Chloe Sage. Age 1. 2007.

Mommy: Clo Clo's a big girl... Lets go potty.

Chloe: Ok Mommy, potty time fun!!!

A week later, I was giving away a box of size 3 diapers n pull ups. No night accidents. I swear it was that easy.

Mommy: Clo Clo, lets stop nursing.

Chloe: I was done anyway.

No nighttime feedings. No nursing for comfort sometimes. It happened just like that.

Mommy: Clo Clo, on to sip cups ok??

Chloe: Why did we ever even use babas?

We just threw em out. Never looked back.

It was easy. A little too easy for a young inexperienced mom. I thought I was ALL THAT in the mommy department. I mean, I had weaned and potty trained in weeks. WEEKS. Not months! Taught me NOTHING! Well, except to look at other mommies with 3yos that were not potty trained like, "HA, what are YOU doin wrong?? Potty training is a piece of cake!" WRONG wrong wrong I was.

So here I am, looking in the mirror, as black as all the pots I called out a couple years ago. All my friends children going potty, and me, paying that extra $20 fee for babysitting with diaper changes.

I did learn something very interesting yesterday. I was listening to a radio show that reminded me to focus on the essence of my child. I looooooove my S'vaani, and I swoon over that baby till the cows come in. BUT. She wont go potty. Here is a glimpse of Vaani's way of life.

(Total wakeup call for me, btw..)

New experience. S'vaan, Age 2.5. 2010

Mommy: Vaani such a big girl.. No more bottles, ok?...

Vaani: I'll give up the bottle when I feel like it. And thats not today. Sorry ma.

Mommy: Vaanipooh, lets stop nursing...

Vaani: Not a chance. Especially if I get hungry at night. And what am I suppose to do when I need comfort?? Pull it out ma, and get over yourself.

Mommy: Vaani... POTTY TIMMMMME!!! Lets go potty.

Vaani: Naaa, thats aiight. Can u hand me my diaper?

Sigh. Whats a young mamacita to do?? I have read every book, tried every old wives trick, sat her on the potty every 20 minutes for the last 6 months of my life! I've even reasoned with her about "getting Dora all wet.." Im just outta ideas people.

So, my bloggin mommies, what has been your potty training experience?? Give me some suggestions!

My glass house, and someone just peed on the floor.

xoxox LLP

30 Days of Gratitude

Gratitude. Merriam Webster defines it as the QUALITY of being grateful or thankful. Well this certainly explains how gratitude can be so easily overlooked.

So one day, Im sitting at my laptop, right, and I take a look at my work associate turned friend Shelley's fb page. And there it was. She decided to implement for her life something she called "30 Days of Gratitude". A time to reflect and share the things in her cypher that she was appreciative of. How beautiful! Well. As I read her posts daily, something touched me in ways that I cant really comprehend completely enough to explain to u, readers. But what I did do, after that feeling, was wonder-- Why do we have to THINK about being grateful? Why is this no longer reactionary?? Then it dawns on me. I need to get that back. The only way to cultivate a QUALITY is to actually practice it right??

Well in my recent meditations, I have really thought hard about my life. Myself. My health. My children. My internal state. My external wealth of materials. I thought about the light that I have to offer and I thought about the light that has been shared and even reflected on me from others. And I think now, What has happened?? Where did my understanding and my soul go? How did I forget that these things are not promised, guaranteed, always necessary, or even always deserved?? They are not even always asked for, petitioned for, worked for... So why do I find myself sometimes behaving as if they are all of those things?? Am I grateful? Thankful? Am I a spoiled brat?? LOL

So, fast fwd to this weekend. The Feed the People drive. I wasnt able to attend as planned, but a few good friends of mine did. I was fed the experiences and I yearned for more. Was I grateful for what I have now that I hear about people who have less?

I have decided to embark on Shelley's 30 Days of Gratitude. Through my third eye of understanding I do not believe GRATITUDE is just a quality of thankfulness. Not just a passing "Thank you." For me, it is an essential practice for happiness and fulfillment. It humbles the heart. You give it. You receive it. You affirm it. You treasure it. You inspire it. You think it. You unite with it. You deliver it. You EXPERIENCE it.

Get it?

So, while it would be best to start during my new moon- during regeneration and the beginning of a new cycle, I have decided to start today- a week early. I will be blogging daily about the things I am grateful for. During this time, I will also be living proof of my gratitude by trying to only eat raw living foods and juices. LadyLovelyPeace's glass house is being washed. U can watch if you wanna.

xoxox

What are you grateful for?

This DEST-In: Young Hot Mama Surprises Herself By Being Responsible!

Let me start like this. I would be banished from my sister circle if I disclosed the way we roll at our annual Big Girl Slumber Party. But I will say, the hostess definitely has the mostest. That is exactly why a few months ago, when she called to invite me on a mini vaycay in "early September" to Destin I was 120% on BOARD.

So fast forward to this week. For whatever reason, this week, the Sept 11th weekend is hardcore filled to the brim with activities!! I have 10 equally important events going on... Not to mention the fact that this marks week 3 of Chloe's pneumonia (which, by the way, is turning around pretty well now that I saw my herb doctor last week). But the phone rings anyway. All plans are in order... LadyHostest(with the)Mostest is ready to pull out this weekend. What is a mama to do??! Needless to say, my vaycay funds have definitely changed since I became a young hot mama of 2.. And my motto is always, "who's gonna mother the mother??" So imagine my want and need for a little R&R and grown up queen love. But here is what I did.

I GREW UP this morning!! Who knew!!? I was so shocked to hear myself tell my girls, "na, yall go on ahead without me this time, I have too much happening on my end this weekend..." HA! Now I know for sure that what I am really feeling in my heart manifests itself in my actions. Because, while I made every plan and excuse, and as my clothes were thrown into my favorite weekend bag, I knew this was just not a good weekend even for the most relaxing and inexpensive trip with the girls. I have much responsibility here with my children (who are still very small) and not to mention a few other obligations - like the Feed The People drive this Sunday, for which I signed up as a volunteer to make sandwiches and care packages for the homeless and ones in need. Today Im filled with gratitude that I have the strength and motivation to be a good, unselfish mommy, a responsible businesswoman, and a reliable friend to my people and my community. I have faith that my mothering will come.

So there u have it, LadyLovelyPeace's glass house. Look at all the cracked ornaments. LOL